Lately I have discovered something about myself, I know I am easy going, friendly and open person but I also found out I am still shy, cautious and I have been saying no to the potential of making new friends as an adult. Can we all agree – Being an adult is so complex, I never knew that it would be this way when I was a teenager who couldn’t wait to spread my wings and fly. I have been lucky in my life that I have kept friends from my childhood, my best friend is still the person I met when I was 6. We grew up but still grew into individuals who respect and love each other. As we move into adulthood, the element of trust is difficult to have with a stranger…therefore adult friendships appear so complex.
As much as I love my tight knit group of school friends, I feel that for so many years I have closed the opportunity to connect to others and meet new people. In a way, I guess I kind of felt I was betraying them with new friendships made outside of the circle. Or not being able to express my personal thoughts and trust someone to understand them. As an adult it can be tricky to make those close connections with a another adult…because it is a whole different playground. Being a kid in the playground was easy, friendships were made over sharing a bag of chips or laughing at the same cartoons. With adults it’s about emotional connections and similar experiences. Developing a friendship in adulthood, is when you can share something that you wouldn’t normally share with a wider group.
I am a naturally reserved and private person, so without being aware of it, the way I would go about avoiding making new close friendships was to say no to outings or activities that was outside of my ‘comfort’ zone. So this time, I decided I want to change that way about myself and make an effort to connect.
So far I have begun to meet up with other mums from Lil Miss S school and started seeing my work friends outside of work. I am enjoying it very much, breaking free from my shell and not being shy about being social. It’s quite liberating and my confidence is growing day by day. I am learning so much more and life is enriched by different interactions.
If you are feeling a little lonely and need to find a friend to share common interests with, don’t be shy, I encourage everyone of you to reach out and give new friendships a chance. By allowing yourself to become ‘available’ again and share your likes & dislikes you may find another alike human being. We get so bound by the ‘busyness’ of it all, life and especially the interference of social media that we forget how to interact like humans and regain that emotional connection again with another person. It is such a beautiful and refreshing thing to care for another person, to smile, to enjoy a moment. Something that is completely different to passionate love, or filial love…friendship is such a gift.
Friendships is not measured by the number of people who you have on your Facebook. It’s about how many will stand by your side when you are in trouble or when you need help and a listening ear.
Have a great Wednesday! Wow…only 1 more day till a 4 day weekend. Wootwoot!